How I Deal With Problematic Kids Think Tank

Dealing with problematic kids is not easy. There have been more than a few people that think that abusing a problematic kid is OK. In reflection of the last post on this website I have read several comments of people who expressed the desire that problematic kids need to be abused.

The Problem of Control

There is no one on this earth that is in control. If one thinks they can control another human being then they are suffering from a great delusion. We have a better chance at controlling the wind than we do in controlling another human being.

Controlling high school kids is futile. Here a person is dealing with many belief systems and prejudices.  A person in authority in such a situation should not deceive themselves into thinking they can control it. If they think this way then such a person will fail not only the students but themselves.

Immaturity vs Maturity

The immature think they are in control. Such a person deceives themselves. If such a person is in a position of authority they deceive the ones they oversee. Eventually this false sense of security will catch up to them and their empire falls.

Rejection of the System

Trying to put the wind in a box is the same as trying to control a child. Some people have put up videos of children beating up their teachers as proof that these children need to be beaten. I do not agree. Some people think that blaming the parents is the answer. However, a child may not act this way in front of their parents. Child rearing does start at home but every family is different are they not?

Culture shock from a home life to a structured school life can be too much for some kids. They can get into trouble as they try to adjust to the change. Once they get into trouble they then begin to believe they are failures. The domino effect begins from elementary school to high school. The system failed the kid, now the kid is resentful to the system.

Solution #1 Compassion

If a person in authority fails to have compassion for the kids this will be their fundamental flaw. A compassionate person will listen and try to understand the world though the other individuals eyes.

Solution #2 Empathy

Do not confuse sympathy with Empathy. If you show sympathy to a child they will hate you. Pity or feeling sorry for someone with sympathy accomplishes nothing and is insulting to the one it is shown to. Empathy however is the ability to “understand” the child and their feelings.

Solution #3 Listen

If a person thinks they have it all figured out they are fooling themselves. No one has it all figured out. Just listen to a child’s story, do not offer solutions while they are talking. Let them finish telling you what their problem is. Every child is different even if they are from the same family.

Solution #4 Guide & Be Adaptable

The only thing adults can do with children is guide them. We can guide the wind we cannot control it. The interest, challenges  and talents of every child differs. We must be adaptable. Sticking to a rigid paradigm will make you fall.

Solution #5 Do Not Aggressively Confront

Aggressively confronting someone including children only put them on the defensive. One can throw bull shit laws, policies and rules out the windows that they have been comfortable with all their life. Everything that you as an adult have learned about right and wrong become very subjective when you are trying to convince someone that does not understand or does not agree. Refer to the above 4 solutions.

Children are anarchist at heart, they do not want to be bound by laws, rules and policies that make no sense to them. They want to be helped and guided, not controlled. If children feel oppressed we can expect to have a very violent town in the future. If they feel guided and helped you can expect to have a very fruitful society in the future.

Solution #6 When All Fails

If a person is at a loss on what to do with a child then one must admit defeat and failure. Get another job!

So You Wanna Be A Teacher

A very noble and sacrificing way of life. It is NOT a job, it is a career choice. A career is a way of life not a job. The greatest quality a teacher can have is “Adaptability”. A teacher is more of a minister or pasture than a ruler or a boss.

  • You want to work with children? Refer to solutions 1 to 5.
  • If you do not possess these natural qualities and skills, do not be a teacher.
  • If you want to play blame games, do not be a teacher.
  • If you want an easy life, do not be a teacher.
  • If you do not want to be accountable, do not be a teacher.

Youngstown East High School Principal Crushes Student

A Youngstown East High School principal crushes a student apparently with the help of another student. Tryvan Leech, Sr. is seen below on top of a East High Student in an altercation.

east high school principal Tryvan Leech, Sr.
East High School Principal Tryvan Leech, Sr. Crushing Student Under His Weight
Youngstown East High School Principal Crushes Student
Youngstown East High School Principal Crushes Student

 

What Led to Principal Tryvan Leech Sr. Crushing This Student?

On Thursday October 29th Mayra Espada the mother of the teen who was crushed came to my house. She was in tears and feared for her son’s safety. She reported that her son was in an altercation at school with another teen who was taunting her son with foul language. Apparently Mayra’s son was expressing a desire to quit the football team and the other teen did not like it. Mayra’s son reported that he was hurling insults at him and demeaning terms when the altercation took place.

What Are Your Thoughts?

As I look at these pictures I cannot but help think about what was going though this principal’s mind when he decided to jump on this teen with his heavy body. Of course this man is more powerful than the teen but does this give him an excuse for excessive force and dominance? It seems this school gets away with way too much and I hope with the new school board in place they will not tolerate the abuse of students.

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This is no Way to Reach the Hearts

Brute physical force is no way to reach the hearts and minds of children. This is an old school tactic for out of date an uneducated people. The solution is NEVER VIOLENCE FOR VIOLENCE!  What kind of cave men are in charge of our children’s safety and well being at school? The pictures above disgust me on many levels. I think every parent needs to ask themselves, “What if that was your child?”.

For a principal that makes $87,560 a year I think this situation should of been handled totally different.

The Family is Looking For Help

Mayra is now afraid to send her child to school and with good reason. The family is looking for someone to represent them in this battle. Please contact Youngstown Angels if you can help this family restore their peace of mind. Youngstown Schools have gotten away with way too much and will continue this kind of behavior until they are stopped legally!

Tell Tryvan Leech sr What you think by contacting him below.

Principal:  Tryvan Leech, Sr.
Tryvan.Leech@Youngstown.k12.oh.us
Phone:  330-740-4005
Fax:  330-742-6464
Address:
474 Bennington Ave.

Youngstown, Ohio 44505

Update: More information

It is also ironic that the principal did not file a report until a week after this incident occurred. I just got off the phone with the mother and Father of the student. They reported that while the Principal was holding him down the other students were kicking him in the back and face.

Angels We Need Your Help Again! Child Abuse at East High?

Yesterday I received a disturbing message from Facebook from a mother who is very concerned about her son. Keena Hardy wrote me the following message.

Hello Maximus how are you hoping all is well. I was writing to ask you about a petition my son was involved in a shoving match at school on Monday and the cop that was working at the school basically used unnecessary roughness that didn’t have to be done all because when he was told to sit my son refused. They say he was placed under arrest for disorderly conduct and while in cuff the cop slammed my sons head causing his lip to get busted a knot in his head and his front tooth missing. We already have people involved trying to investigate but everything that happened to my son was done out of the camera view and they are telling me that my son did the damages to his face by himself. I’m sorry it’s just so hard to believe. So I was thinking I should start a petition to get signed to see something done to this cop that was involved. The only problem I have is knowing where do I start from it how to get it started didn’t mean to be a bother but I just feel like the unnecessary violence needs to end somewhere. Thank you

As you could imagine my heart skipped a beat or two after reading this. I asked her if she would come down to my office so I could get more details about this. The details shocked me so I decided to do a video about this. Let me start out by telling you that this is a very nice family, the children are very respectful and kind and full of hugs and laughter. It kills me that good families have to fear for their children’s safety at school. The very people that we put in charge of our children’s safety are sometimes the causes of why they are not safe. We are starting a petition to have that security officer removed from service. Manhandling our children is NOT acceptable behavior! We want this case fully investigated and not pushed aside. I hope the school board will continue their child safety efforts and bring to justice the ones responsible for inflicting injury on this child!

Child Abuse at East High School Child Abuse at East High School Child Abuse at East High School

My Viewpoint

The children at East High are good kids. They have taken a stand against bullying and more. However after hearing this story and my own experience it seems like we can include certain members of the staff in the Bully list! Sure children are going to do things that are not right, they are children. A 13 year old boy afraid with adrenaline rushing needs to be calmed down, not have his head thrown down on a table!!! This is nothing more than child abuse and the people that are responsible need to be brought to justice. Threatening disorderly conduct of a 13 year old boy is ludicrous! Please sign the petition to have these people responsible for child safety answer for their crime!

The following petition will go to the principal of East High School. If we do not get any results there we will go above his head!

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